Samstag, November 27, 2010

Report

Mi thirst was a strong as ever. And i was so very imaptient.
And Mistress gave me her allowance. Under the condition to reveal everything.

I got myself naked.
And i wrapped a scarf around my neck, tied its ends together and attached a stick to it.
A perfect garotte.
I went on my knees and started to turn and tighten the scarf.
A strangulation instantly has an impact on the whole body, heartbeat quickens, it gets hot, every muscle is under alert and tension, panic is rising. Entwined with a profound feeling of punishment.
And while continually reducing the air, i started to fantasize how it could be like:

How Mistress would strap it on and have me on my knees. Worshipping her power with my mouth. And then how she would tie me up carefully, get me in place, and penetrate me, all slow and easly.. at first.
And how it would be her, to turn of the air, to make me squirm under her, like the naughty boy i am.
How she would ram and strangle me, ever harder, ever more intensivelly...

Quickly i came on the floor.

Dienstag, November 16, 2010

Eventuality

I have been drifting in the void.
i have been feeling the idle sensibility of my body. Its pointlessness, its delinquency.
And like out of nowhere, Mistress sets foot on my excistence, and all of a sudden my perception is suffused with her presence.

I adore my Mistress,
how she soothes my burning skin,
how i may gaze at her,
how she easily wields her feminine power over me.

In fact Mistress owns me completely,
i cease being a person and become a toy in her shadow, a toy filled with raw emotions and sensations, she can play on.

Maybe one day she will claim my complete submission, and i will have to string myself up.
I am sure i will be anxious about that, and all selfishly hesitant.
I am equally sure i would do it.
First i would carefully finalize my live.
Then i will walk out in the woods,
dressed liglty, a long red rope in the backpack
i will search for a fitting tree, a strong gnarled one, who already carries the weight hundreds of years.
I will undress.
And i will hang myself slowly,
keeping a hankerchief in the hand saying: "I love you, Mistress!"

If Mistress likes, i could visit her so she could watch...


sloppy boy

Sonntag, November 07, 2010

Urge...

I am lying on my couch idly, when i suddenly feel the void.

It starts with my neck, that itches along a circle, where a noose should be placed.
And then the void is creeping down my spine, spreading into my limbs, slides under my skin, until it is everywhere.
And i am enriched by the void, by the knowledge, the complete realization of my worthlessness.

My mere existing is tort:
1) I am a deficiency, that is to be wiped out,
2) furthermore, i deserve to be punished.

Slow death in the noose is the answer, the appropriate method to meet both requirements.